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Tuesday, October 12, 2004
Human nakong mabasa ang Deadma 101 ni Jessica Zafra, nakahuna-huna ko nga dili gyud madeadma ang kahawud natong mga Filipino sa pagbuhat ug mga pulong nga atoang masabtan ug magamit sa kaugalingong konteksto.
Gani nahinumduman ko ang pulong nga una kong nadungog sa akong amigang babaye. Mao kini ang ‘mahadera’. Nakadungog na ba mo niini? Atong unha ko ni nadungog, mingkatawa ko maski’g wala ko makasabot niini. Apan mas nawindang gyud ang akong kalibutan sa dihang gihimay-himay sa akong amiga ang buot niyang ipasabot niining pulonga.
Unang nalitok sa akong amiga ang ‘mahadera’ sa dihang gatan-aw mi ug usa ka kalingawan sa among eskwelahan. Sa among paglingkod-lingkod sa likod, usa ka tambokong babaye ang ming-ilog sa among mga panan-aw gikan sa stage. Sa kalihokan ug balik-balik nga pagsuroy-suroy niini sa amoang atubangan, mingsugod na ug saka ang kilay namong duha sa akong amiga tungod dili lang ang kadako niini ang gatabon sa amoang mga panan-aw apan ang kadako usab sa baba niini nga gasiyagit-siyagit nga gatudlo sa mga kauban niini ang gaalingog-ngog sa among mga pandungog. Kulot kaayo ang buhok niini ug nanggawas na ang gahagdanan nga bilbil sa iyang lawas tungod sa gisuot niini nga huot nga puti nga t-shirt nga mura’g gihiraman ra niini sa iyahang manghud. Ang baga-on niini nga wait mingsamot ug burot tungod gabula-bula ra ang baba niini nga gaistorya sa iyahang mga kauban. Nahibaloan namong usa diay siya sa mga mag-present maong ingon niadto gyud siya kalihok.
“Lihokana uy. Kalaming kumoton, gaali na sa agianan, manabon pa ug panan-aw.” Mingsugod na ug putak ang baba sa akong amiga nga galingkod sa akong kilid.
Ug usa ka buhakhak ang gitubag ko niya.
“Mao na ang mahadera!” Ug mingkatawa sab ang akong amiga human niya ug istorya.
“Mahadera?” Pangutana ko niya samatang gaagik-ik pa ko sa akong nadungog.
Ug pipila lang ka minuto usa ka bayot ang ming-agi sa among atubangan samtang gataas na ang among liog ug tan-aw sa stage. Nabira na sab sa bayot ang among panan-aw tungod sa gisuot niini nga see-through nga blouse nga abuna pa gyu’y kwelyo nga de-lace. Dungang nabira sa bayot ang among panan-aw pati ang among mga kilay pataas.
Gabahis-bahis sab ang bayot sa among atubangan samtang gingisi-ngisi pa niini ang bagaon ug pula-pula niining wait. Ug kadalakang niini ang hangin nga gabahis-bahis pud niadtong gabihiona, minghikap sa iyahang dako ug masulon nga panglawas. Ug pirti na gyung klaroha sa lawas niini sa dihang gabahis-bahis kini sa among atubangan.
“Klaro man sab ang lungs.” Ug mingsugod na sab ug panghinaway ang akong kauban.
“Dili nako makaya ang lace baday!” Sumpay pud nako sa iyaha samtang gatutok ko sa bayot nga gaistorya sa halos tanang tawo nga iyahang naagian.
“Well, mahadera number two.” Ug nadungog ko na usab ang pulong sa akong amiga nga halos dili na ma-drawing ang nawong nga gatutok sa bayot.
Anaa kami sa usa ka gamay nga parlor sa Mintal aron magpaputol ug buhok sa dihang nadungog ko ug usab ang pulong. Gfahulat kami nga mahuman ang giputdan ug buhok nga nauna kanamo (kauban ko gihapon ang akong amiga) sa dihang natutok na pud namo ang among panan-aw sa usa ka babaye nga gapa-manicure sa iyahang mga kuko sa kamot. Sa katag-as sa kuko niini mura’g hapit na niya ma-parente ang mga wakwak, wala pa’y labot ang gadugo-dugo nga pulahan niining kolor sa kuko. Apan dili lang ang kuko niini ang nakatigib sa among mga mata, pati ang kuluton, uga ug bulagaw niini nga buhok nga giwagayway pa niini samtang gatan-aw sa dakong samin.
“Ipa-stretch unta na nimo aron mo-straight.” Atik-atik pud sa manicurista nga gabutang ug kolor sa kuko niini.
“Lagi, apan ba-o pa man gud nako ni gipakoloran, basig madaot.” Tubag sab sa babaye nga mura’g grabe gyud ang pag-amuma niya sa iyahang buhok nga wala na’y dauton kung tan-awon.
Sa suot sa babaye nga sphagetti strap nga pula, mingporma ug samot ang mga bilbil nga nangawas na sa iyahang galanay nga lawas. Ug mura usab ug galanay ang pula-pula niini nga nawong nga gasinaw sa singot. Samtang klaro kaayo ang kalahi-an sa kaputi sa nawong niini nga galahi ra sa brown-brown niining nga liog. Gangisi-ngsisi ang baabye kanamo samtang gasinaw usab ang pula-pula usab niini nga wait. Suma total gasiga gyud kini kung tan-awon.
Ug mingsamot pa kini ug kainit sa dihang ming-abot ang fafa niini nga naka-unipormi pa sa Army. Mingpalit kini ug durian ug gikaon nilang duha sa amoang atubangan.
“Wala gyud nanghagad.” Hunghong sa akong amiga nga gangisi sa babaye maski’g halos ming-abot na sa iyang agtang ang kilay.
Wala ra namo gipahalata ang among mga gibati hangtud sa nanguli nami kay ulaw sab sa mga tawo sa parlor. Apan sa dihang pasakay na mi ug sakyanan, nakit-an namo ug usab ang pulahang babaye nga gabaktas sa may gamay nga palengke. “Certified Mahadera.” Ug mingkidhat pa sa akoa ang akong amiga sa dihang mingsakay na mi sa sakyanan.
Sa dihang mingpauli na mi ug gibasa nako ang Deadma 101, wala gyud nako malikayi ang mahinumduman ang babaye. Mao daw kadto ang Certified Mahadera matud pa sa akong amiga. Sa akong paghimay-himay, dili lang sa sinina, sa lawas ug sa inistoryahan nimo mailhan ang usa ka ‘mahadera’ apan pati usab sa lihok. Ug sa akong nasabtan mahadera gyud kanang makabitad sa kilay pataas. Apan dili man nako ma-pin down kung unsa gyud ang pasabot sa mahadera, matud pa sa akong amiga, sa baho pa lang, ilhan mo na!
Armela Gertos:Humor Writing
Posted at 10:18 pm by iskolar
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Ruling over the music scene this late 19th century, The Corrs offers a summary of their career from then. This Irish band consisting of three beautifully talented women who are great with instruments (Andrea Corr on lead vocals and tin whistle, Caroline Corr on Drums, Bodhran, Piano, and backing Vocals, and Sharon Corr on Violin, and backing Vocals) together with their brother, the only guy in the group, Jim Corr on Keyboards, Guitar, and backing vocals, now offers The Best of the Corrs, which enclosed all the hits that this stylish pop group has to offer. With the coldly angelic voice of Andrea, the youngest in the family, and the classical touch in their contemporary pop music, The Corrs has captured the sweet and sour taste of the youth these days.
The packaging of the album itself captures the senses of the music lovers featuring the members of the band in their own musical instruments. True indeed that Sharon’s violin and Caroline’s drums have captured the hearts most especially of young women who wished of becoming like those talented swans in concert. In addition, the violin’s classical touch in a pop music of the band made a whip for their career!
In this newly released album, The Corrs decided to include two unreleased tracks in this CD: the mellow "Would You be Happier?" and "Make you mine", an old song they composed but never released in CD. The album consists of 18 hits all in all.
Their track list begins with the song “Would You be Happier” (one of my favorites), which asks in the beginning, “Have you ever know where the story ends and how it all began?” somehow asking about the start and the future of the band which has burst loudly in the music scene in the late 1990’s. This song also starts with a slow pace and grows faster and louder as it goes on, which is one of the usual distinctive paces in most of their tracks.
There is no disputing that The Corrs classics such as "So Young" and "I Never Loved You Anyway" are catchy, pleasant tunes that succeed so well because they are so simple not just with the lyrics but with the tune as well. Their simple beats and tunes are easy to follow and to remember. The gentle but whimsical “What Can I Do?” is sunny and lovelorn and at the same time, with a catchy “Do do do do” hook which they are also fond of using in their songs.
All the other favourites are also on here, including "Only When I Sleep" and "Give Me Reason", as well as three tracks from 1999's Unplugged album ("Radio", "Everybody Hurts" and "Lough Erin Shore"). It also includes the remix of their two mellow and lowly songs, “All the Love In the World” and “What Can I Do?”. Although the collection closes with the unremarkable new track "Make You Mine", the second to the last song is "Dreams", the Fleetwood Mac rack that finally brought them success.
The Best Of the Corrs has captured the band’s hits into a single disc, releasing a contemporary pop beat with a classical touch much from the violin’s and the flute’s instrumentals, which best suit the mellow and poppy thump of a tale of love lost and found as told by The Corrs. The whole album is poppy enough but isn’t too bad at all. This album is best for the shining romantic lovers in this contemporary time. Though, the album also offers slow and draggy ballads like “What Can I Do?”, the faster tracks like “Breathless” and “Radio” (the one which topped the chart list for how many weeks that time) with its jolly and happy tune can sweep one off his feet!
Armela O. Gertos : Music Review
Posted at 10:10 pm by iskolar
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MUSINGS OVER THE RECORDING:
Grooving to the Key of C Minor
AH, CLASSICAL MUSIC! You imagine musicians in tuxedoes playing inside large concert halls filled with the elite of society –– dignitaries, philanthropists, the rich and famous–– dressed in tuxedoes and evening gowns, clapping like genteel and cultured citizens. Then the twenty-something Maksim Mrviça, a pianist who looks like a model straight from the magazines dressed at the cutting edge of fashion, performs on stage like a pop star with dramatic effects like video screens, lighting and laser–shows, dry ice and ballet dancers in the background to an audience, half of which is under 30 years old, grooving to the disco beats. You gasp and say: What the ––?
From playing a hundred-year-old piano at the basement of a music conservatory during the war to international renown, Maksim has definitely come along way. Born in 1975 to Croatian parents in Ŝibenik, a town on the Adriatic coast, he started his rigorous musical training when he was nine, held his first public performance at the same year, and bore witness to the horrors of the Serbo-Croatian war that erupted when he was 15. In 2003, he released his first pop/classical crossover recording entitled The Piano Player.
The first track of the recording, a rendition of Rimsky-Korsakov’s “The Flight of the Bumble-bee,” opens with the sound of sea waves breaking against the shore, succeeded by pumping electronic beats, the bees then take flight with the furious sound of Maksim’s fingers hitting the ivory keys, and weaving into this luscious jungle of sound is the buzzing of the strings. After the first track, one who listens to this recording will definitely agree that this is not your grandparents’ typical classical music. The Piano Player creates a perfect synergy between the modern techno/disco beats and the timeless sound of the piano with the flourish of the orchestra resulting to a turbulence of sound that converges in a center, the eye of a musical storm.
Managed by Mel Bush, the same impresario that popularized the pop/classical crossover genre through the violin virtuoso Vanessa Mae and the string quartet Bond, Maksim shares with his predecessors the sense of experimentation and diversity of influence that characterize artist under the new musical genre. Maksim’s repertoire includes cutting-edge (re)mixes of classical pieces like Grieg’s “Piano Concerto in A minor,” Handel’s “Sarabande,” Rachmaninov’s “Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini” and Chopin’s “Revolutionary Etude in C minor” –– re-creating the timeless classics for the new generation of audience by tapping on the vast reservoir of rhythms and beats of pop and dance music.
The recording also boasts of six tracks composed by contemporary Croatian composer Tonci Huljic who also collaborated with crossover string quartet Bond. From the slow, romantic pieces that are perfect for the “Dear Monica” segment of the local radio station Love Radio (“Claudine” and “Hana’s Eyes”) to the upbeat, disco anthems perfect for clubs and parties (“Wonderland” and “Croatian Rhapsody”) to the Latin-influenced dance tracks which capitalizes on the sexy tempo of traditional drums and the Spanish Guitar (“Cubana” and the bonus track “Cubana Cubana”), The Piano Player invites listeners to sample a smorgasbord of sound, showcasing the extent of the influence of world music on Maksim.
With The Piano Player, Maksim proves that the piano is a contemporary instrument capable of far more than repeating standard classical repertoire. Maksim writes in his CD sleeve: “Coming from a classical background and now using new technology in sound and production, I have really been encouraged to explore all my musical parameters. I hope you enjoy the experience.” Indeed, many are embracing the different musical experience that Maksim has to offer, evidenced by the popularity of his album worldwide –– achieving gold status in Singapore, Malaysia, China and Croatia; platinum in Taiwan; and double platinum in Hong Kong. To borrow the imagery from his “Flight of the Bumble-bee” video, Maksim’s The Piano Player strikes the listener with the subtle grace of ballet and the knockout force of boxing.
Posted at 07:44 am by iskolar
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Wednesday, October 06, 2004
(unhumorous) humor writing
WEATHER FORECAST: IT’S RAINING MEN
by Michael N.R. Bonghanoy
WHEN THE WEATHER GIRLS SANG “It’s raining men! Allelujah! It’s raining men! Amen!” back in 1983, many women flocked to the streets just about half past ten to witness for the first time in history the raining of men. Every Specimen! Tall, blonde, dark and lean / Rough and tough and strong and mean. So many women went out of their houses so that each and every woman could find her perfect guy. Obese women who has difficulty finding the right men their size, old women with saggy breast and dead lovers, ugly women too hideous to marry, women trapped in men’s bodies, disgrunted mistresses with tiny-dicked lovers, dry nuns, prostitutes, etc. In closed quarters, the feminists were arguing among themselves how to address this crisis. The lesbians were also contemplating the effect of this meteorological phenomenon while the butches were readying their motorcycles to run over the men who will steal their girlfriends.
And so it happened, Mother Nature took off to heaven and did what she had to do / She taught every angel to rearrange the sky / So that each and every woman could find her perfect guy. And they began to fall. One by one. The women gathered in the streets exclaimed: Allelujah! Amen! But oh, Mother Nature should burn in hell for the sin of omission. She forgot the law of gravity. A 300-pound man fell so fast he crushed an old matron in a cane, a bulimic model, and a slightly overweight virgin (there were no known survivors). Then old and toothless men fell on top of a group of prostitutes (three died of hemorrhage while four suffered a severe concussion). A few men with free wheelchairs fell and injured many. There ensued a general panic as muscled men, skinny men, tall men, blonde men, dark men, rough men, tough men and other kinds of men fell. Many fell over the sea and drowned. Many fell on roofs and destroyed property. Many fell on the streets and crushed their bones and skulls on the pavement. And many fell, piled on top of women and killed them.
THE MORAL OF THE STORY: (1) The law of gravity applies to all. (2) Never trust Mother Nature. (3) When men start falling from the sky, run for cover. (4) Don’t expect men falling from the sky to be alive and kicking when they hit the ground. Amen!
Posted at 08:49 am by iskolar
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Tuesday, October 05, 2004
That Faint Line Between Fate And Coincidence
That Faint Line Between Fate and Coincidence
May Love L. Oniola
Oded Kehr said one of the most quotable lines in the movie The Mummy – “There is a faint line between fate and coincidence.”
Indeed, the terms are so interlocked with each other, I can’t say where the first term ends, and the last one begins. When one says “Fate” it usually means that everything that has happened, is happening and will be happening in ones life has been preordained, predestined, fated or maktub . On the other hand, when one says “coincidence” (or we could call it “luck”) some event happens to someone without him or her planning that event to happen – it just happens for no apparent reason.
But can’t I also say that coincidences have also been fated to happen? What I mean to say is that if I follow the thought of “our lives being preordained,” can’t I also assume that everything I thought were mere coincidences (like meeting the love of my life in the least likely of places or finding a five-hundred peso bill in the sidewalk just when I needed it most), were actually all maneuvered by Fate? So how can one event be a mere coincidence when it was fated to happen? When can I say that fate is coincidence and coincidence is fate?
* * * * * * In 1996, the grade six students of Royal Valley (SDA) Elem. School anxiously waited for the list of students who would take the NEAT (National Elementary Achievement Test). The school had decided, since almost 95% of its Grade 6 students always pass the NEAT, that it will choose only twenty (20) Grade 6 students to take that year’s NEAT. The teachers then randomly raffled the names of the students taking the exam. I can only recall several of the names picked and they are as follows: Ricadorie, Valene, Maximo, Junife, May Love, Lendl, Figurado, Liefred. These are all unique names. What I mean with “unique names” is that they are names one usually does not read or hear anywhere. Every student in that class who had a unique name was picked out, and I had wondered that day: was it fated that all of us with unique names be picked to take the exam? Was it destined that we prove ourselves to our teachers and to our classmates that our unique names are worthy of us – unique because we’re the chosen few? Or was it mere coincidence that all of us should be chosen? After all, not all of those who were chosen had unique names. But still, I can’t help but wonder…
* * * * *
On August 12, 2000, my grandfather, Ramon C. Oniola Sr. (may he rest in peace) died at the age of 90. A day before he died, my parents, my younger brother and I visited him in the hospital. (It was my first time to visit him in the hospital then.) He had all sorts of contraptions attached to his frail and bony body. The doctors said he was stable. Then the following morning, my aunt who was looking after Lolo when we left the other day, came to our house to inform us that my Lolo had passed away.
His death was not unexpected by the entire family, for he was already 90 years old and he had been paralyzed, due to a heart stroke, for several months, but still, his death was still a blow to all of us, and, unknown to the entire family, it was a most fearful blow especially to me. For several months after he died, I tortured myself with the thought that I was the carrier of death in my family. You see, several years ago, my aunt died of cancer. I also visited her only once in the hospital, and days later she died. And I had wondered: if I had not visited them all those times, would they have lived a lot longer? I now know this is a silly thought, but then, a little child could not help but wonder of these things. Was it a mere coincidence that all those she loved should die days after she visited them for the first time in the hospital? Or was it just fate and her visitation of them had no connection to their deaths whatsoever?
* * * * * This thought of fate and coincidence came into my head again right after I watched Chito Rono’s Feng Shui. It is said in the movie that if anyone saw their reflection in the mirror, they are fated to die. But logical thinking dictates that there are no such things as curses or fate. There are only causes and effects.
I noticed that in the movie almost all of those people who died in the movie (at least those whose deaths were explained) had their deaths coming to them. For example was the death of Luz Hernandez (the woman who owned the bakery). She died of a sickness that one can only get from rats. She fell on the floor while doing something (it was not explained what) – for she was an old woman, and old people are really prone to slippages and such – and lost her consciousness. I took notice of the bakery and it was not exactly a “clean” place, so it is not really entirely impossible that rats are roaming around the place.
Next is Lotlot de Leon’s death. Maybe if she hadn’t treated that drunken man the way she did, maybe the man wouldn’t have gone berserk and thrown her off the window. Of course, there will be those who’ll defend her actions and say, “But she was nervous and frantic! She was going to die for Chrissakes! Who could think straight when you know you’re going to die?!”
The problem with the people in that movie was that they believed in the Tarot cards, in the hula, so much. Kaya nga hula eh, kasi hula-hula lang. If they hadn’t let their emotions get the better of them, they wouldn’t have died! “But what about the Chinese woman? What about Lotlot’s vision?” Frantic minds can think of many things when they’re near to breaking down. Who’s to say that what she saw was reality or just the workings of a delirious mind?
And then, there was the death of Jay Manalo and his mistress. They were both married to different people; they knew they were cheating their spouses, and their spouses knew they were being cheated on. The difference was in the spouses: Kris was contented to plead with Jay, the mistress’s husband was not a man of words; he was a man of action, and did what a man of action does when faced with a problem – he faced the problem with a shotgun. Maybe he figured if he can’t have his wife then no man could have her either. Boom! The shot bore a hole on the wife’s lovely figure. Then he turned to Jay and pointed the gun at him. He was maybe thinking that Jay was the reason why he was never able to have his wife. Boom! Another hole on the other man. Then he bore a hole through his mouth, maybe he was thinking that maybe if he can’t have his wife in this lifetime, maybe in death, he’ll finally get lucky. Boom!
And even the matter of Kris’s procuring the eight-cornered mirror was her fault. Nobody told her to bring the mirror with her. When she wasn’t able to find the man, she should have left the mirror wherever she found it, or wherever she could have put it. But curiosity kills the cat, she brought the mirror with her, and although the cat didn’t get herself killed, she got her entire brood killed.
So, were the deaths all caused by the bagua? I can’t really say. I have never been in a situation like that of in the movie (and I am praying that I will never be put in such a situation – having all those people I love killed in a span of one week WILL kill me). But what I could say about this movie is that it was able to impart to me one message among the other messages that it is trying to say – that life is unpredictable. One day you’re living the ideal life (as what the earlier scene in the movie portrayed, with Jay coming home from work and being greeted by his family), and the next you can’t even determine whether you’re still living or just dreaming you’re alive. Despite the debate whether fate is real or coincidences aren’t true, one thing is for sure, one must live one’s life as though it is one’s first day alive or one’s last day to live.
Posted at 09:02 pm by iskolar
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She is Grace
(A Profile of Ms. Marie Grace Tanquilan)
May Love L. Oniola
On the glass window of the cashier’s office, a note is plastered saying: “For STFAP allowances, please see Grace a.s.a.p.” One day, two students approached the window and read the note. One asked her companion, “Kinsa diay na si Grace?” The other one shrugged her shoulders and answered, “Basig kadtong tangkad na payat.” Although the other girls had guessed right, it was obvious that neither of them was sure who Grace was.
Her complete name is Marie Grace P. Tanquilan, and she is the one that students of the University of the Philippines in Mindanao usually go to when they need to get their allowance. I am one of those students who go to her for my allowance. One could say that she holds the key to my future. There was one incident that happened a couple of semesters ago when I almost was not able to get my allowance because when I signed one release paper and she checked my signature with the signature on my ID, she said, “Hala, dili man pareho ang imong signature diri ug dinhi.” Of course I need not tell her that the girl in the picture (without the glasses) and the girl she’s talking to (with the glasses) are the same people. She was already familiar with my face; but the differences with the signature could be held up against her when the auditing of the finances happens. So I let her do her job, and I anxiously waited for her in front of that glass window, like a goldfish waiting for its meal.
Several agonizing minutes later, she came back and apparently whatever problem she had with my signature was smoothened out because the normal procedures for the procuring of my allowance happened without another single hitch. She smiled at me, showing teeth that were hilang, and softly said, “Ayaw’g hilak. Naa na lagi kay kwarta karon.”
Because of that incident, her face was forever engraved inside my head (the tall and thin woman who works in the cashier’s office, and who wears anything but sleeveless or spaghetti-strapped top and short, above-the-knee skirt, and stiletto shoes). I knew her face so well – the curly lashes and the dark-brown eyes, the brown thin cheeks and the modestly painted lips, and the clear glasses that rode her long nose – but I did not know her name. I never took the time to know her name.
Everyday, I would see her walking down the marbled corridors of the Administration building. Sometimes her hands would be burden-free and I would see her snap her fingers to a tune only she could hear. There would always be a light spring on her step whenever she walked, and a ready smile to anyone whom she passes by and who also happens to be looking at her. She does not seem to mind showing her hilang teeth. Sometimes, I would also see her carrying folders and envelopes in her arms, and I would hear her humming.
Several days ago, I happened to be sitting on one of the marble steps of the stairs that led to the second floor of the Administration building. I was reading some articles for my class for that afternoon when I saw her coming up the stairs. She smiled at me, showing me her hilang teeth, and asked me, “Study na pud?” I smiled at her in response and, as she passed me by, I heard her murmuring under her breath a song that I vaguely recalled as one of those songs that I had sung in a Loved Flock fellowship meeting at CAP auditorium last May of this year. And I remembered seeing her there.
She is one of the longtime members of the congregation, and that day, she had gone up the stage with the other longtime members and began leading the other members (including me) into a round of hand clapping, foot-stamping, and body-swaying round of songs. (I remembered one of my classmates saying, when I asked them if they knew who Grace was, “Ah, nikanta man ‘to sya og UP hymn. In fairness, nindot siya og tingug.”)
On her way up, a colleague, who was on her way down the stairs, patted Grace on the shoulder and said in a loud voice, “Salamat ato, Grace, ha?” and she replied in a sing-song voice, “Walay sapayan.” It seemed to me then that she was famous among her colleagues and also with the other students who were familiar with her. I had seen some students approach her and offer her food during break time. Some students prefer dealing with her than with the other people in the cashier’s office because she seems to be the only one who is not frowning when she’s working. But strange enough, even though she was approachable, not many – including me – ever took the time to know her name. Just “Grace” or “Ate” or “Ma’am.” But she doesn’t seem to mind this because whenever one student approaches her in that aquarium-like office, a warm smile always springs on her face and a soft voice follows that: “Unsa ma’y ato, gang?” Indeed her genuinely warm greeting is a welcoming reassurance to those students who anxiously approach her for their allowance. Her name fits her quite perfectly – she is Grace, the woman who graces the poor students with their monthly graces.
Posted at 08:55 pm by iskolar
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Rules To Follow In A (Funeral) Parlor
Rules To Follow In A (Funeral) Parlor
As told by Lola Basyang
(Translated by Her Many-times Removed Granddaughter)
May Love L. Oniola
No housekeepers allowed. (Do not sweep the floor.)
The bringing of hair paraphernalia (comb, shampoo, conditioner) is strictly prohibited. (Taking a bath and combing one’s hair are strictly prohibited.)
Barbecues are not aloud. (Don’t grill anything.)
Please observe silence. (Music-playing/listening is not allowed.)
Crossover players are immediately fouled out. (Do not cross from one wake to another.)
Women on their way to maternity must leave. (No pregnant women are allowed during the wake.)
Snow White’s stepmother and Narcissus are discouraged to enter this establishment. (Do not face the mirror during a wake.)
Please make room. (Do not put away the dead person’s things until a year has passed by.)
Gatecrashers and unpleasant companies are encouraged to stay for forty days. (The house must not be left empty until after the fortieth day of the dead person’s death.)
Dracula is banned from this establishment. (The house must not be left in the dark until the fortieth day of the dead person’s death.)
Posted at 08:48 pm by iskolar
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The Lost and Found Love
If you’re too much of a cynic, don’t watch the movie because for sure you will roll your eyes and will probably say, “this film is too good to be true”. But there’s only one way to find out if you’re cynical or romantic at heart. Watch the movie and let’s see if you’re too cynical or too romantic.
The Notebook is definitely a film for romantic at heart. One critic says that “ it knows when to pull your hear strings and flutter you with saccharine”. Basically, the movie is about falling in love, losing your love one, and expecting and believing in miracles that someday you’ll have her/him back. It is based from the novel written by Nicholas Sparks who is also the author of the best selling novels A Walk To Remember and Message in a Bottle.
The movie is a story within a story. The movie would bring us to the present and to the past. Director Nick Casavettes bring us scenes that would shift from the past and back to the present. The story is told through a flashback. An old man named Duke (James Garner), a resident in a lakeside nursing home has a ritual of reading a love story from a notebook to an old woman ( Gena Rowlands) who suffers from Alzheimer’s disease. The story that Duke reads to that old woman is a real love story of a young couple. As he reads the story, the scene would bring us back to 1940s in a small town at North Carolina. The story is about a passionate summer love affair of young Noah Calhoun (Ryan Gosling) and young Allie Hamilton (Rachel McAdams). Noah, a 19 year old man falls in love with a Allie who belongs to a high class family. The couple spends the summer together. Everything is fine until the mean-spirited mother of Allie, Mrs. Hamilton (Joan Allen) comes into the picture. Unfortunately, Allie’s class -conscious mother doesn’t like Noah because for her, Noah is trash, he is poor and he doesn’t deserve Allie. Before the summer ends, Allie and Noah end their relationship. Allie has no choice but to back to her hometown. Their break up is both not easy for them. Noah writes her a letter for 365 days but Allies’ mother keeps all the letters.
Time moves fast. Allie is now engaged to Lon Hammond, a lawyer. While preparing for her wedding she sees Noah’s picture in a newspaper. Because of that, she never loses the chance to see Noah after seven years. Meeting Noah again brings confusion to her feelings. She’s soon to be married with Lon but she’s now confused. When she’s with Noah, she remembers her free-spirited self but when she’s with Lon she’s different. She has to choose between Noah and Lon.
The movie would bring the viewers again back to the scene where old Duke is sitting beside the old woman. Duke still continues reading her the story. The old woman would ask him if Allie chooses the right man. Duke closes the notebook and says that the story ends. But a miracle happens. The old woman remembers that it is their first love and she’s Allie. Duke is the old Noah. This revelation would be surprising if the viewers haven’t read the novel.
Director Nick Casavettes film is truly unfaithful to the novel. I’ve read the novel thrice and I have already memorized the characters including Noah’s dog Clem. In the movie, I haven’t seen any dog. Thus, not everything in the novel is shown in the movie. At first, I did not enjoy the movie because, I always asked myself or my friend “Was it there in the novel?” I realized that it would be better if I completely disregard the novel when watching the film. In the movie, the conflict is clearly shown while in the novel I notice the subtlety of the conflict.
As I mentioned earlier, I’ve read the novel for three times and now I’m glad to see that the characters I keep in mind is now alive. Thanks to the actors and actresses who give life to the movie. Rachel McAdams as Allie does a terrific performance because she is able to portray young Allie as carefree and very energetic girl. I couldn’t believe that she’s the one who played the queen of the meanest girl in The Mean Girls with Lindsay Lohan. Ryan Gosling is also adorable. His portrayal of young Noah would make all the girls fall in love with his character. At first, I always complain why him, but as the movie goes on I learn to love his character. The viewers would really fall in love with Gosling and McAdams because they have done a wonderful job. I could really see the beautiful chemistry between them. I shouldn’t forget to mention the performance of James Garner. I don’t remember myself crying over a movie inside a movie house because for me it’s humiliating (that’s for myself only) but when James Garner, as old Noah cries upon seeing her wife Allie pushing him away and tells him that she doesn’t know him. I couldn’t help my tears from falling.
Another thing that I like in the movie is that I can’t also help but admire and appreciate the beautiful views/scenes. The beautiful flock of swans in the river for example, would drive the viewers to dream about the ideal place to spend with their love ones. Yes, this movie like any other heartwarming love stories has the same predictable plot. Some would say that all the things that have been going on are all crap but let me say, that it is the first movie that I let my tears fall. (joanah marie ampo uddin)
Posted at 06:40 pm by iskolar
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Duhaylungsod, JC
4 BAE
Music Review
Album Title: Halad
Artist: MaxSurban
Recording Studio: Star Records
Produced by: PS Manufacturing
Kadtong bata pa ko, magbagting ning akong dalunggan inig ka dominggo sa buntag sa mga kanta ni Yoyoy Villame ug Max Surban. Unsaon man na ang akong amahan kay mahilig man maminaw sa mga kanta ining duha. Basig nag aso-aso ang dalan sa ka-init sa adlaw sa Mayo o Abril o basig kanus-a sa summer, naglanog among balay sa mga tugtog sa Jingle Bells, Rudolph the Red Nose Raindeer na gilataran ug bag-o nga ni Yoyoy. Ug sa kabugnaw sa tag-ulan, makit-an ko na magsayaw-sayaw ang akong amahan samtang nagakanta sa Opao ni Max, na mahitungod sa usa ka tawo na namroblema sa iyanhang ulo na hinay-hinay na na-upaw. Mao, sa akong pagdako, ako na pud na nakalingawan ang tugtog, hilabi na ang lyrics sa duha ka bisaya na mangantahay ug, ingon pa sa pagbrand sa mga taga music industry, mga novelty songs.
Karon, sa pag kiyod-kiyod sa mga tao sa kanta na Otso-Otso, sa pag kisi-kisi sa sayaw na Ispageti o basin man lang sa pagpiyong-piyong sa mata samtang naga-awit sa kanta na Piluka Kong Itim, daghan kaayo na mga channel, mga tv shows matag pani-udto, ug mga singers-kunuhay ang naga angkon na sila ang naka-una sa istilo sa ilang kanta: kana bang adunay pagka bastos, naay pagka-kataw-anan, na mura ang uban ug gitikon samtang ilang paminawon.
´Hahahahay Inday, ayaw ako ug pakataw-a,¨ mao siguro kini ang ma-ingon ni Max Surban sa mga mangangkunay na ni. Gikuha sa iyahang isa ka kanta, Bibingka ug Budbod, usa sa mga kanta na intir sa iyang album na Halad (Karaoke Version), na mahitungod sa usa ka tindera ug bingka na gina pangayuan sa iyahang tinda sa usa ka manindahay ug budbod. Kani na kanta, nagapakita lang sa pag gamit sa simbolo sa bingka ug budbod na sexual organ sa babaye ug lalaki. Lingaw kaayo siya paminawon, hilabi na sa mga kasabot sa simbolo sa bingka ug budbud ug sa mga tao na kasabot ug bisaya, kay ang simple na pagkumbinse sa lalaki sa bbabaye na hatagan siya ug bingka kay mura ug pagpakumbinse sa lalaki sa usa ka babaye na makipaghilawas. Aduna pa gyud diskripsyon sa bingka na, ¨nagtisngi, nagngisi¨, ug sa budbod na,¨dako¨ Gitapos ni Max ang kanta sa pag-awit, ¨Kung espesyal na imong bibingka, mas lami kining ako-a!¨.
Kauban sa kanta na Bibingka ug Budbod, naa pud ang kanta na Gihidlaw Na Intawon Ako (Mitulo Na), na basig mahitungod sa usa ka tao na nasubo ug ¨Mitulo na ¨ ang luha, ma-ingon ang kanta na adunay lain na pasabot tungos sa paglahi ug paghatag ug empasis sa ¨Mitulo Na¨. Dili na siguro nako kahinanglan pa na ipasabot sa inyo kay kabalo ko na kabalo mo kung unsa ang buot pasabot ni Max.
Apan dili lang man puro mga double-meaning na mga kanta ang unod ining albuma. Aduna pud kini mga kanta na haum sa mga bugal-bugal sa mga bisaya. And kanta na Ang Trato Ko kay mahitungod sa usa ka laki na naghistog sa iyahang uyab. Nasaugdan ang ubang linya sa kanta ug ¨Ang trato ko...¨ ug ginasumpayan kini sa usa ka koro. Pareho ani: ¨Ang trato ko, baho kaayo¨ ug masumpayan kini ug ¨puti´g ngipon,¨ unya tubagon na pud ug ¨puro pustiso¨. Mahimout kam maminaw sa kanta kay pirti kaayo ang pagtamas-tamas sa persona sa kanta sa iyahang uyab. Gihuman ang kanta sa pag-ingon sa naminaw na ¨Bantog ra naay lusay, kay bayot diay¨.
Gigamit pud ni Nong Max ang pagstereotype sa mga Bisaya ug sa mga Ilonggo sa kanta niya na Kontis Sa Hambog, kung asa kining mga tawhana kay nagpataasay ug ihi sa ilahang mga sugilanon, na kung buot huna-hunaon, puros ra but-bot. Mura ka ug naminaw anang mga hubog sa mga kanto, na kung mahubog na, magbasa na lang ang baba sa pag-istorya ug mga walay hinungdan na mga butang.
Ug tungod kay Pilipino man si Nong Max, dili gyud mawala ang mga kanta na mahitungod sa gugma (dili bugal-bugal sama sa Ang Trato Ko). Aduna ang Baleleng ug ang Gugma Ko,
Ang tempo sa mga kanta ni Nong Max kay naglahi-lahi. Sama sa bibingka ug Budbod, Diskoral, Turagsoy ug Ulan, makasayaw ka sa pagkapas-pas sa kanta. And mga kanta na Upao kay haum lang ang ka-pas-pas, apan dili sama sa na-una na gipanghisgot. Ug ang Baleleng, Gihidlaw na Intawon Ako (Mitulo Na) ug ang Trato ko kay adunay pagka mellow.
Sa sulod aning albuma, tungod kay para man siya sa karaoke, mahimo na musabay mo sa pagkanta ky Max sa iyahang mga lingaw na kanta. Napahi-unod pud dinhi ang mga sikat na kanta sa mga Bisya na Matud Nila, Bisan Sa Damgo Lang ug Dahong Laya na gikanta sa uban na mga singer na Bisaya.
Tinuod na kasagaran sa mga tugtog ni Max kay nag-gikan o halos pareho sa mga uban na sikat na mga kanta. Apan dili man pud nato mahimo na isnabon ang mga lyrics ni Nong Max kay basig tuod aduna kini pagka bugal-bugalon o pagkabatos, masinati man nato na gigamitan kini ug utok samtang gibuhat.
Sa ako siguro na henerasyon, basig tuod adunay ganahan sa mga kanta ni Nong Max ug mga singer na pareho niya, ma-ulaw ang uban na mu-angkon na gidak-an na nila ug paminaw. Basig siguro ako. Siguro dili nato mahimo na ikumpara sila kay Chopin o kay Beethoven, apan mahimo man siguro nato na muhunong sa atong pagka sundugro sa mga Amerikano, ug maminaw basig kadiyot lang sa mga kanta Ni nong Max ug lain pang mga Bisaya na Mang-aawit. Mahimo man pud siguro nato na gamiton kini aron isagpa sa mga Tagalog na ang atong pagka Bisaya kay dili lang malimita sa mga dialogue sa mga katabang sa salida. Kana kung makasabot sila!
Posted at 03:34 am by iskolar
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JC Duhaylungsod
4 BAE
Well, if you are tired of scanning those magazines for top of the rank va-va-voom motorcycles, just get a copy of the movie entitled Toque. Like its sister/brother/mother/father/whatever movie, The Fast And The Furious, also produced by Neil Mortiz (the very fact that the movie was very proud of), big and sassy big bikes were decorating the movie screen . Pick whatever style you like ( 1992 TZ250, 1992 NSR250 SE, S4, 99 ST4), whatever color (plain of with different combinations), how fast or ¨furious¨ (ach!), no matter how big and bulky, the film had it.
Having the penchance for motorcycle, my mouth was open the whole time the movie was showing, while trying to figure out how those dudes and dudettes manage to do every single exhibition they did to a very common vehicle in this generation. While they were swerving and accelerating and jumping on and off a moving train, I was wondering if I would also be able to do all of those groin aching stints. Now, how the hell did they nurse their groins by the way?
Now, how the hell were the production came up with those bikes? Well, before shooting the movie, the people resposible for the casting posted invitations to all motorcycle groups in the US to attend the filming of the movie. Bikers from all over the country, riding different kinds of bike, answered the invitation. Not only did this solve the problem of the casting production, it was also able to gather mtorcycle enthusisiasts from all over US.
But heed these simple words of advice: Just focus on the motorcycles and the motorcycle stints in the movie. Do not attempt appreciating the story line and the quality of acting of the casts or you will end up cussing about your wasted money. Yes people, sad fact, the movie was a trash. If we take away all of the stins, it would just look like a sloppy romantic/action flick between hot chics in tight costumes, very obnoxious gang leaders and a very airy lead man.
The story was all about this Cary Ford who went away to Thailand, which was always mistaken by the other casts in the movie as China, and went back to Los Angeles after six months to finish an unfinished (of course!) business he had with his girlfirend, Shane (a motorcycling chick who owned a motorcycle shop). And not to mention his uncanny engagement with the lead antagonist, Henry, for stealing his precious bikes that had ¨high-grade drugs¨ in the tanks.,
The movie opened with two racing cars, obviously alluding to the sister/brother/mother/father/whatever movie The Fast and The Furious, racing on the deserted road going to the city of Los Angeles. Behind them was a motorcycle, driven by the main character, who was trying to pass between the two arrogant eggheads in the two cars. And since he was the protagonist of the film, he was able to outdo the two racing cars and left the two machines eating a billow of dust. This was followed after by a fight scene between the two drivers of the racing cars and Ford. And again, since he was the lead character, he won the fist fight which ended up bnefitting the young car washer who got ten dollars from the wallet of the two fallen enemies.
The movie was flooding with a lot of improbabilities and incoherence. For example: Why the hell did Ford, in the first place, steal all of Henryś mercahndise? What was his reason> Was he trying to be a benevolent motorcycling hunk? Or he just did it so he can have a movie entitled the Torque? Number Two: Who told his two buddies, Val and Dalton, that their good motorcycling buddy was back in town and was somehwere in a diner beating two car racers? And after all of the body cringing and balls popping fist fight, only then did the two showed up?
Another horrendous thing about the film was the dialogues. Not only were the characters seemed to have swallowed a rock (they remind me of someone I knew at school), they also seemed to have picked almost all of their qoutable lines somewhere in the archives of the ¨Famous Movie Cliches¨. Lines like:
Val: Every major road into L.A. is blocked. I know you said it wouldn't be fun if it was easy, but does it have to be THIS much fun?
And because of the shortnss of words of the writer of this movie, some seconds later, the same character muttered this line to the protagonist,
Val: You want this hour's bad news? Every major road in L.A. is blocked! I know you said it wouldn't be any fun if it was easy, but does it have to be THIS much fun?
hereś an exchange of words between the two hot chick in the movie before engaging into a cat fight while riding their precious motorcycles:
China : You messed with the wrong chick!
Shane : [Shane knocks China off her bike] Looks like you did, bitch!
and another....
China : [before the bike duel] You want some of this, bitch?
Shane : Oh, I thought you'd never ask!
and thereś a lot more. Now, imagine all of these lines uttered in a Iḿ-so-cool-I-talk-like-Iḿ-Stallone-in-a-gangsta-role tone. Try practicing it in your own, I tell, it is fun.
And to top it up, after all of the explosions, exaggerated motorcycle speed (car windows actually got broken when the Y2K motorcycle passed them), tongue exposures, ruined motorcycles, so cliched toughie-toughie-dialogues,a nd all of the you-are-seeing-the-insides-of-a-motorcycle-while-running side effcts, the movie was just all about a get together of Ford and his girlfriend. That the fim was just an action-coated romance lick. Hahahaha! The storyline of the Notebook was better, but it also had its flaws (of course!). But thatś another issue.
So in watching this film, if you still have the gusto to do so, always, always be reminded of the warning I gave earlier.
For this movie, I give five fingers for the motorcycle and one, the middle finger, for the film itself.
List of People to be Crucified:
Director:torque.movie.com
Joseph Kahn (feature film debut) Former music video director for Aerosmith, Janet Jackson, U2, Destiny's Child, Moby and Ice Cube.
Screenwriter(s):
Matt Johnson,
J.P. Donahue,
Kevin Polay
Producers:
Neil Moritz
Cinematographer:
Peter Levy (Broken Arrow, Cutthroat Island)
Composer:
Trevor Rabin (Deep Blue Sea, Enemy of the State, Con Air)
Studio:
Warner Bros. Pictures, in association with Village Roadshow Pictures and NPV Entertainment.
Release Date:
January 16, 2004 (wide)
Actors:
Martin Henderson (Cary Ford)
Ice Cube (Trey Wallace)
Monet Mazur (Shane)
Will Yun Lee (Val)
Jay Hernandez (Dalton)
Adam Scott
Faizon Love (Sonny)
Justina Machado (Henderson)
Christina Milian (Nina)
Jaime Pressly (China)
Nichole Robinson
Matt Schulze (Henry)
Dane Cook (Neil Luff)
Sources:
www2.warnerbros.com/torque/?frompage=sitemap
romanticmovies.about.com/od/torque/
www.themoviebox.net/movies/ 2004/STUVWXYZ/Torque/main-page.html
www.correspondences.org/archives/000534.htm
www.thezreview.co.uk/comingsoon/t/torque.shtm
www.ducatiridersclub.com/html/09-21-02.html
Posted at 12:08 am by iskolar
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A good essay must have this permanent quality about it; it must draw its curtain round us, but it must be a curtain that shuts us in not out. ~Virginia Woolf~
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